Over the last couple of years I have watched a ton of Japanese movies, mostly horror*. In the middle of watching Mutant Girls Squad I realized that I have naturally picked up one piece of the language during this time, which I think is spelled “nande yo ne”. It means, roughly, “WTF?”. This is a phrase that is used a lot by both the characters and the audience during Mutant Girls Squad.
The movie is kind of a broad winking take on X-Men, and the plot such that it is revolves around strange mutant girls who live and train together. Near the end of this movie there is a fight involving one girl armed with breast swords and another with an ass chainsaw. Yeah, you read that. Ass. Chainsaw. Nande yo ne?
Mutant Girls Squad was released under the Sushi Typhoon label, which seems to have an ethos similar to Troma (creators of the Toxic Avenger) only with a dollop of that very Japanese menacing sexuality. It features blood, blood, blood, death, boobs, more blood, and cosplay nurses.
If you’re okay with that, however, it’s pretty fun. Mutant Girls Squad doesn’t take itself the slightest bit seriously —it just wants to show us some cute girls with tentacles lopping off limbs to a techno beat. On that scale it is a rousing success.
* This is a discussion for another day, but K-horror > J-horror. FYI.
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Mutant Girls Squad is currently touring North American as part of the Splatter Matters tour, which is still due to arrive in Ottawa, Toronto, Saskatoon, and Philadelphia. Proceeds to go Japan Earthquake/Tsunami related charities.
Here’s a more thorough review and a really bloody trailer from YouTube.
Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels, 1998
There are some movies that are so iconic that it actually does them a disservice. Take The Matrix, for example. It blew away audiences back in 1999 with its “bullet time” camera technology and cyberpunk stylings. A million .. well, let’s call them homages rushed out in the Matrix’s wake and to be honest when I catch these scenes in movies even now I tend to roll my eyes. I’ve seen this! It was great. Done. Next! But oddly enough I find I have the same Matrix-fatigue when I’m actually watching The Matrix. I have to make a concerted effort to remind myself that no, this isn’t a knock off, it’s the original and it was pretty dang groundbreaking in its day.
I mention all this because while it’s not quite as revolutionary as The Matrix, Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels has often been imitated since its release in 1998, not the least by director Guy Ritchie himself. It is a great, great movie, but when watching it again over the weekend I found myself having to keep in mind that Lock reimagined the British crime caper and not the other way around. The huge cast of characters, twisty plotlines, and violence set to rockin’ beats has been often duplicated since Lock came out, but in my opinion it has yet to be bettered.
The entire cast is stellar. It’s hard to stand out in such a huge array of characters, but almost everyone with a speaking line seemed to have a twinkle in their eye and a story in their back pocket, even if we never got to see it. The plot is convoluted without being irritating, and all the crime and death is done with a light enough tone that the viewer can sort of float right over it. It’s just business — don’t think about it too much, luv.
The movie is sort of diminished by imitators now, but it’s worth remembering that in its day Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels was a breath of fresh air and is still a slammin’ good time.
Quick, before the coppers get here I give this movie
Piranha 3D, 2010
This was much more fun than it should have been. It has a slightly suspicious cast — Ving Rhames? Elisabeth Shue? Jerry O’Connel? — and cameos by Richard Dreyfus and Eli Roth. (And no, I didn’t think I’d ever write a sentence with those two names.) There are boobs. So many boobs! And gore. Ohhhh, soooo much gore. Ludicrous amounts of gore and boobs and gory boobs.
Those factors alone would probably put the movie over the top enough to be a good watch, but it additionally there’s a … merciless quality. Director Alexandre Aja seems to have an almost palpable hatred of “young American” culture, and it oozes through the reels as beautiful blondes and boozy boys are literally torn to pieces before the might of the all consuming piranha horde.
Basically if you’re going to watch a killer fish movie, make it Piranha 2010!
I rate this: